As to why he wants to be 'the heavy', my H started pressuring me about the car because he is worried about money - he can't pay for it any more and needs me to.
When I said I needed to know about my financial situation before I could make a decision, he was put in a hard place. He cried and said he 'could not bring himself' to separate our finances. It was 'too hard' and there was 'too much history'.
So he decided to get a lawyer to do it for him.
He also seems to want to 'tell the world' that we are 'separated'. Not sure why he is being so strong on this. To me, it's no-one else's business really. We are still amicable, and cooperative in regards to the kids, so it's not as if we would break out fighting if we encountered one another at a school function.
If I was going to mind-read, I'd say its because of dissonance - he needs to keep us apart because things are pretty much fine whenever we are together. It just makes it apparent that things are OK between us - even fun and happy a lot of the time. For other people to see this would be make the incongruity too much to bear.
