Here are my goals. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Beat 'em up if necessary.
1. To end the conversations that lead to never understanding her feelings and my role in causing them, resulting in productive understanding conversations. We will be listening more closely to expressions of feelings and trying to understand actions or words that caused them. I will end or change the direction of conversations that appear to be headed in that direction by walking away, re-stating her points, asking more questions.
2. We will be discussing going to counseling together.
3. To be there for her how she needs me to be, whether supporting her ideas, or merely sympathizing with her frustrations. When she brings up her issues or ideas and asks me for help, input or advice, I will respond with that, if she does not ask I will sympathize with her issues and acknowledge her ideas.
Any comments on my DR goals?
1) Is this helping to give SPACE? 2) Who's idea is this? Yours or hers? Same as above 3) I do not think that being there for her is going to help you to restore your marraige, it is more pursuit and counter productive to what you should be trying to do.
She is in another relationship right now. Is this correct? Do you think that Begging, Pleading Bargaining, pursuing her is going to end that other relationship? I can assure you that it will not.
I think you need to go back to a Beginners MIND and relearn what you need to do.
Finish reading the DR book, and go back and start on those resources.
