You know I don't think there is a 'better' life stage for MLC to happen either for us or our kids. While I am deeply grateful it didn't happen when the children were younger, the effects on late adolescents and young adults are devastating, and known to be devastating, from studies. They see a parent behaving with inappropriate sexuality, when they are exploring their own. They doubt their own ability to make successful long term relationships, and it disturbs them. They sort of understand what is happening, as much as any of us do. Their illusions are totally shattered. And for older men and women, we face a future alone, with little chance often of recovering our financial position. Someone posted to me that money isn't everything, and I agree. but I planned to the latter part of our together, and it was the separation of death that we planned our finances around, . . . a reasonable assumption after 30+ happy years
IB I simply do not know how you cope week after week having to face your h + OW making a public spectacle of themselves. I think your courage and dignity are beyond words. Most of us here, I believe would find a reason not to go to these games, but you stay in there, putting your son first, and setting a breathtaking example not only to your children, and all who see it, but to us here. Please never ever beat yourself up. The wound never has time to heal before it is ripped open again.
So it is always always tough and horrible, at any life stage.
