Forgiveness

[antlers]

at THIS point Antlers,

your retorts will be seen as you getting last word in. Not as cute jokes or peace offerings. Maybe much later, like in a year

you two can communicate more normally. A short while back you advised me that if I received a communication from her, to respond with some wit, be brief, and have ZERO expectations. That's all I'm doing. Honest.

TIl then, just keep her abreast of school notifications and document that (email w/attachments will suffice) and

don't work so hard at improving something when it's too raw for her.

It's like picking at the scab saying you want it to heal. It can't heal right now. Leave it alone. OK. Makes sense.

Stay strong and consistent for your kids. That's your mission for now. I am staying consistent. I intend to continue. I'm staying strong too...even though the situation with my son is painful. Got another real bad nastygram from the school a few days ago.

You do NOT have to communicate "well" with her, ever. I realize that...but it'd be nice. For the kids and us.

You just have to keep her informed. We can hope she follows suit later. But you can't expect it any time soon unless you feel like seeing her in court. I picked up daughter from school today because she texted me that she was sick and asked me to come and get her. I texted her mom to let her know. Fuk court. I don't EVER want anything to do with court again as long as I live.

But the more you keep her informed, the better you will look in court IF she brings you back there. And it's good for the son to have both parents know the real deal at school, so he can't play as many games with you. I'll keep her informed. She's getting all the nastygrams from the school too. She's known the real deal at his school for a long time now. Hasn't mattered in the past. She's used every opportunity to take advantage of the situation. Maybe that'll change...I don't know. I can't control that. I'll continue to do what's right regardless.

Don't underestimate the value of him having sibling time either. He loves and misses his mom and his sister, so this living arrangement does not shock me even if all was going well with you two. I'm sure he missed all of them. All was going well with us, except for him acting out. It still hurts for him to have acted like he has since he's been gone.

There may come a time when they both change their minds & come live with you,

but just don't make your first response a request for child support from their mom, okay? OR a "victory" for you. If that ever came about, I WOULD NOT do that.

Hang in there. I am. It hurts...but I am. I AM enjoying being with my daughter more.

((( )))