I need to get myself into the sexual R. I think he also means holding onto yourself in the R as well. Becoming a bolder version of me will enhance intimacy and sexuality. I get to keep working on that masculine-feminine mix of who I want to be, but show it for the world and my W to see.
CL, this jumped out at me. I realize that we are all merely somewhere on a continuum between "100% masculine" and "100% feminine," but why do you feel the need to find a "masculine-feminine mix" ?? If you've decided that where you are on the male-female continuum has skewed too far female, than you should be seeking some "100% male" behaviors and activities that push you more to the man side of the equation, yes?
If your wife were posting here, where on that continuum do you think she'd like CL to be ideally? Where were you on it when you two met, and she became attracted to you?
