Regarding the OM or OW the probability is that this is a very needy person with lots of issues. Once the OM or OW start to make emotional demands the MLCer will run hard and fast from them too. They will be almost as nasty to them as to you.
The MLCer cannot stand needy, or emotional people. They want to be happy every minute of every hour of every day of their lives and they expect the OP to make this happen.
In my case W's OM thought he was her rescuer and very soon became her victim.
If one or other is a bit passive aggressive you can guarantee the whole relationship is built on a total pack of lies by one or both of them. Your H will have fabricated the history of your marriage to appear the victim, the OP is probably gullible, or co-dependent or at least very low self-esteem.
My wife's OM, got needy and made emotional requests/demands and had his life (in the short term anyway) destroyed by my W. His last words to my W 'Why did you do this to me?'. At the time I felt a bit sorry for him he had been in the wrong place at the wrong time.
