Bklyn Queen

[ces67]

Hey BM, is it a full moon this week or something? I'm right there with you on the exhaustion feeling! Hang on though, the energy will return.

BM said:
I sometimes feel like I am carrying the weight of the world on my shoulder. Everyone on these boards has encouraged me to be more forth coming regarding my sitch to neighbors but I have still not discussed it with them. It is wearing on me. It is unbearable to me to discuss this with an acquaintance I feel humiliated.

Ces- What if you're carrying a weight you don't have to? In the past few months, I've decided on a personal 180 of putting myself out there with who I am. I've opened up to people to some of my ugliness and been very frank about it.

You know what I found out? We all have crap we have to deal with and when I was willing to open up, so were others and low and behold, I've made some very strong friendships. In addition to this board, I've got guys from multiple states who call or text to check on me weekly and I do the same for them.

Some of the opening happened in a very structured retreat that helped break down my own barriers but then I found it was easier to share in more social setting with guys as I got to know them.

BM said:
I apologized for asking at the last minute and also said it is okay if I dont go for coffee after. He later apologized and said he was being immature.

Ces- sounds like you handled this really well! Good for you.

As far as the fake BF, my 2 cents (and that's probably the actual value of this opinion)...Don't waste your energy on a facade. Focus your attentions on friendships that are meaningful and go enjoy them. It could get draining to keep up a fake scenario like that.

I hope the feelings of humiliation pass, because it truly is a burden you don't have to carry. Your human, and tough stuff happens to all of us at some point. Keep your chin up. You've got nothing to be ashamed of. You're looking at your part of the issues and doing something about it. Shame or humiliation is just looking at past mistakes. You've looked and your moving forward and learning from them. So leave the shame & guilt back there with the old BM.

Hang in there and hope you have a great weekend!