What do you wish to accomplish? If you alert OM's family of his behavior, what do you see them doing? I have a feeling this isn't his first rodeo.
If you go behind an email (and that's what you'd be doing)to the OM, and you tell him you know of his inappropriate behavior and threaten to "expose" him to HR or family, exactly what do you see him doing? This is just my opinion, but somehow I don't see a man getting to upset at a jilted H who sends an email or even a call.
So what if you tell HR? Do you expect them to fire OM, suspend with pay/without pay, ship to another location? They hardly can prevent people from being lovers, if that is what the people want to do. Unless it is written in his contact...or sexual conduct on the business' property can be proven, I don't know that many businesses in today's world that will do anything toward the wayward parties. I just think you need to know what it is you expect from this, before you make that move.
And, there's one more thing. You are directing this as if OM would be the only one affected. I doubt that would be the case. If it were investagated (or not), I'm sure your W would know.
There have been posters who have exposed, some say they were successful, but most were not.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
