Absolutely, I think ALL of us that wind up in this mess do so out of failing to keep our love and marriages alive on a regular basis.
But it doesn't make any of us "bad" people...we've all fallen victim to putting our jobs, kids, personal happiness, etc. first in our lives while our relationship with our spouses fell by the way side.
When we're ALL (both spouses) honest with ourselves we see our part in the dissolution of our marriages. We get 'to comfortable' to 'indifferent' to 'sure of ourselves' to 'self absorbed' and then suddenly someone else steps in to fill the gaps of what our spouses needed but didn't have the courage or ability to tell us about.
There seems to be a thread that runs through all of our relationships on this board and that is that one spouse held what they thought and felt back from US, and the other "withheld" their love and affection (in one way or another) in reaction to feeling thier spouse drawing away from them...We all got our defenses up, fought the wrong battle and lost the war...and now, we have to find a way to make our peace, save face and reunite...it's not easy to do with all the battle scars both spouses bear...but it can be done and does get done, eventually. T2
