BL - your situation is quite different than mine so I am speaking from a position I have not experienced. However, I DO understand the anger and need to feel vindicated to some degree. It's a human emotional reflex. That said, and I am sure you have heard this here before - tread lightly here. By reaching out to OM.HR or worse yet, OM's family you run a very high risk of coming across unstable yourself. You DO NOT want this. This matter is between you and your W, and that is probably the best place to keep it. If you need to say something, follow 25's advice. Don't drag others into this situation - they probably do not want to touch it.
Furthermore, and I think this was in one of the books, you going on the offensive to some degree could further galvonize the relationship between W and OM. How? By creating an "us against the world" dynamic in which they believe "love will conquer all".
Like I said intially, our situations are very different - but you need to take a step outside of yourself and do your best to look at this objectively (hard to do, I know). Many times, and I have found this to be true for myself, initial gut reactions based off of emotions tend to drive us in the opposite direction of where we REALLY want to go. That is what is so d@mn hard about DBing....it asks you to do the opposite of what you normally would do....almost all of the time! But it does get easier eventually - it did for me.
