Rick,

I think all these are things YOU can control, with hard work...

I am with you and I know how you feel, because I HAVE THE SAME ISSUES...
BUT
you first need to be convinced that you can do this!!!

So no need to ask a genie for that.
(See what I am saying?)

Don't dispair!

Me & H: 44
D7, D6, S3
Together: 20y, M: 17y
EA: 11/13/10, Sep: 12/23/10
EA becomes PA: Spring 2011
H filed for D: 09/06/12
D Negotiating began 2/15
OW seemingly gone on 3/15
Still negotiating D