It sounds like your sitch is moving in a positive direction. It is a slow process. Enjoy the positives but keep the positive changes going.
Detaching isn't about not caring for your W. It is about no longer attaching your emotions to your W's behaviours. Bad OR good.
IOW, if your W says something that feels mean or hurtful, if you are detached, you will understand that she is upset, but you will not own and take on that upset.
And...
If your W is in a great mood, being detached means you can be happy FOR her... but your happiness isn't dependent on her being happy.
