Indecision and the affair continues (Part 2)

[Nblost]

Long texting session last night with H. He was very open to texting about our R. We are going to tell the kids we are separating on Sunday. H has no plan for where he is going/his schedule and I said we need to work on that.

I reiterated to H that I don't care about dating right now and I think he gets it. He knows he has created all of the problems. He said he's sure any new guy will wait around for me as long as it takes--I am such an amazing, awesome person.

He is sure he'll have some regrets about his actions. He also doesn't like what he has done to our relationship. I told him that we have the power to change our relationship...we aren't just victims in all this.

I don't think he's ready to give up his A, but I can tell he isn't overly confident about it. He said he's never said the OW was better than me (I would disagree, but whatever)...it's just that she treats him differently in a couple ways that I never did. I agreed.

In the end, he said he loves talking to me. I had commented on how much his affair has impacted me (lost 20 pounds) and he said I just keep getting better and better looking while he's losing his hair. He said he might start needing to do a comb over, and I said if he does...he better just plan on staying married.

I don't know...in a way, I feel like I'm leaving a path back open. I also think there's a chance we could get along well as friends/parents without being married.