She asked for my help to see the kids. I agreed to for a short time drive her back and forth. I gave up my time out to accomodate her request. But she would tell me how bad things are at home with om, how he controls her. She has no job, om pays for everything including her lawyer. She even told me that sex happens only when he gets in bed and tells her his di*# is hard and let's get it over with. Really, I didn't need to hear that.
I would hide in my room for her visits, she would constantly come in, sit on my bed and carry on a conversation with me. She would beg me to cook dinner for her and the kids, if I said no she would pout. It was like she was playing house. She obviously needs me for certain things and knows how to get me to do them.
For christmas, I got $50 towards all the gifts for the kids and she got that from her grandmother christmas day. I also provided for the kids bdays. She says we have to show the kids we can be civil and do things together. My question to that is why?
Is it really in the kids best interest to behave like this? To provide them with a fake reality?
As for introducing change, I tried to talk with her numerous times about the situation. Even asked her to get a job to help with the financial burden of all the driving required to get her to and from her visits. That's when she said a minimum wage job won't help her pay to live and pay her child support and her 12000 in arrears. So she was going to go to school instead.
My only solution was to end the charade, stop doing things for her. I have to stand firm on this or I'm just acting like normal and constantly changing my mind. The kids aren't seeing their mom, but really, shouldn't she solve that problem not me? I told her she can still have her visits at the house, I just can't afford to do all her driving.
