My Sitch/any better ideas than going dark?

[hope2011]

Wow, you've got a lot going on in your situation, Broken.

Sounds like you're on the right track going dark, seeing a counselor, not drinking. Your response was good too.

Yes, that is Jerry Springer material for sure but that's her past, her life. You can't excuse her behavior for it, you can't change it for her and you can't protect her from any issues she may have from it. She's a grown woman, a mother. I say this because I had a Jerry Springer childhood and a Lifetime Movie adulthood so far myself so I'm not judging or downplaying what she's been through... but at some point we all have to grow up and take responsibility for how we handle the situations thrown at us and what we make out of our lives. The things that happened to her aren't fair, at all. But she's 30 years old with 3 kids now - not the 14 year old pregnant girl anymore. You have to let her grow up and pay her own bills, take care of herself and stop giving her extravagant gifts. Mature adults do not take large gifts like that from others, especially when breaking up with someone. Nor do they have affairs. Those are her issues. You cannot fix them or save her... you can enable her but you shouldn't. Nor can you be Prince Charming saving the Damsel in Distress... because while you may believe you are the "best thing that ever happened to her", that's not how she feels or she'd be there with you. Besides, don't you want to be loved for who you are rather than what you can buy? Be a soulmate rather than a savior?

Keep working on you. You're on the right path. What are you doing to GAL?