Thank you KG.... i needed to hear that today...he has been texting me since last night asking how im doing and then today how is your day going....I have not responded at all and its hard. I want to move on and I feel like he is keeping me from doing that by his cute little text ....Im better when I just ignore them, but then i start to question...
but really? How is my day? well lets see, My truck wouldnt start this morning, i dropped your son off at school with no breakfast and no lunch money and then cried all the way to work feeling like a failure as a mom, i have a 15 day shut off notice from my gas and electric company, a quarter tank of gas and 12 bucks in my account....how the hell is your day jack a##....?????
I dont say it to him because he doesnt care, ive asked for help before...3 xs to be exact and he never comes through...so there is not point. He says my lawyer is a b#*ch...well good!!...shes fighting for me and my son and thats what i want her to be!!!
This is not the man i married but it sure is the man im going to divorce...and ill pray for him every night that he can live with the decisions he has made.
Me:48 H:42 M: 18 yrs. S: 9/1/09 due to alcoholic H D bomb: 9/9/11 OW confirmed 10/30/11 D papers filed 11/01/11 S15 S21(Special needs) S28
Look to yourself, It is there that all your answers are found...
WOW! Sounds familiar ITM. Keep holding on and you'll make it through!
Have you applied for free or reduced lunch for your son? Have you applied to your gas and electric companies for budget billing? Just throwing a couple of ideas out.
Honestly, the D may end up being the best thing for your situation because he will be forced to pay what he's supposed to be paying. What money have you been receiving from him? Is it consistent or just whenever he 'happens' to have it available?
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
We did get free lunch at his school last year but for some reason this year they said I did not qualify, and I do get a pro rated amount on my gas and electric and managed to keep up with it until last month and getting my internship done, that kind of put us in the hole. I did speak to my H about that before I started the internship and he had said he would help but of course has not. He gives me a very small amount every week..and always has. before I caught him with ow he would give me extra when ever he worked more hours then normal (which is always..he very rarely works a 40 hr week) and would often take me to the grocery store to stock up. That all stopped... He called my L yesterday and threatened to go to court for 50/50 custody of I didnt agree to lower the amount. that is laughable because he cant even fit S14 into his schedule now..so that does not intimidate me, just verifies again what an idiot he has turned into. She in turn told him that we had originally agreed to waive the arrears he now owes but if he wanted to go to court we would rethink that agreement. He is "thinking about it" now and supose to get back to her today.
I am truly shocked that he has taken it to this level...but thankfull that this has finally opened my eyes to who he truly is. Hes a coward...and Im sad that this is the role model my son has....
thanks for the ideas girls, i really appreciate your support. Oh, and TT..i have used our local food bank actually, for thanksgiving...it was a humbling experience for me, I have NEVER been in that position before. We had a VERY good life before our seperation. My kids were well taken care of and it was an eye opener to have to do that....but I was very thankfull. It just shoved in my face how life can change on a dime.
Me:48 H:42 M: 18 yrs. S: 9/1/09 due to alcoholic H D bomb: 9/9/11 OW confirmed 10/30/11 D papers filed 11/01/11 S15 S21(Special needs) S28
Look to yourself, It is there that all your answers are found...
I never say this but in your financial sitch, I can't wait for the divorce decree and automatic payments made to you...geez...
oh, and I have not EVER seen a man who threatens to "fight for custody" keep fighting --when the past amount owed is sought by the custodial parent.
That shuts them up FAST...you'd come out ahead getting the arrears too--but don't let me screw up what your L tells you.
Thank God you don't live in a northern climate...
Maybe he's squeezing you to get a job-all the more reason to rush things for YOUR sake.
Then again, that's giving him credit for putting thought into this and I'm not sure he is. Sounds more clueless than cruel, if you kwim. Hang in there. It gets better-and you already are.
((( )))
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Thank you KG.... i needed to hear that today...he has been texting me since last night asking how im doing and then today how is your day going....I have not responded at all and its hard. I want to move on and I feel like he is keeping me from doing that by his cute little text ....Im better when I just ignore them, but then i start to question...
but really? How is my day? well lets see, My truck wouldnt start this morning, i dropped your son off at school with no breakfast and no lunch money and then cried all the way to work feeling like a failure as a mom, i have a 15 day shut off notice from my gas and electric company, a quarter tank of gas and 12 bucks in my account....how the hell is your day jack a##....????? you could say, "Since you asked, gas & electric are getting cut off, $12 in account and no food for son this morning or for lunch. School denied free lunches this year. The truck didn't start this am. Don't worry, I ask nothing of you. Just wanted to be polite & answer you."
I probably would feel compelled to tell him this. As long as you expect nothing from him you won't be disappointed. And unless he's totally over the edge, he'll feel shame. I don't know if that will get you anywhere -shame's a weird thing-but he ought to know this stuff regardless.
I dont say it to him because he doesnt care, ive asked for help before...3 xs to be exact and he never comes through...so there is not point. He says my lawyer is a b#*ch...well good!!...shes fighting for me and my son and thats what i want her to be!!! This is not the man i married but it sure is the man im going to divorce... I love this^^^ line...
and ill pray for him every night that he can live with the decisions he has made.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
I was loving that line too 25. As I've said before, I'm in no way an advocate of D but heck, this man has such an unreal idea of what is fair that it's laughable. He wants to fight for 50/50 custody? Yeah right! What advantage does he think that will gain him? UGH! When it comes down to it, it's all about the money and very little to do with actually seeing his son and that is SUPER sad.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
4 different WAH's came to see me about refusing to let their ex w's new h's adopt their kids...but they, the bio dads, had not been able to pay much, or ANY, child support for years. They each owed a great deal of money in CS, but were adamant about not wanting another man to adopt their kids.
When the ex-w's offered to let the arrears go if the their new h's could adopt, I'm sorry to say every single one of them agreed...
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
