long time no hear...what's up in your sitch? Where is your thread, and Denvers?
any news on 9?
Sorry for the hijack LITB...you do sound as if you have turned a corner...
((( )))
No worries 25.
I was glad to see Country's name as well.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
This made me laugh JB. Of course we should be better equipped to not find ourselves in this sitch again. Doesn't mean it can't happen. It just means that we have no excuses to be a part of the problem.
It's the truth, but it was intended to make you laugh. You're exactly right, we will be MUCH better equipped to not find ourselves in this situation again. I don't know about you, but I have a much clearer picture of what I want in a relationship now as opposed to when my W and I got M'd. Like both you and KD, if I find what I think is that relationship, I am willing to put it on the line again.
Originally Posted By: LITB
On a personal note, things are beginning to heat up on the job front in NM. I have 2 interviews on Monday and trying to coordinate another for Friday with 2 more possibilities in the oven.
I'll be praying about your jobs. Like I've said before, it will be interesting to see if/how the dynamics of your sitch shift when you move to NM.
Originally Posted By: LITB
This whole thing about finding out about OM sukks, but I'm glad that I don't have to wonder anymore. I feel as though that I can finally let go completely and move on. I'm looking forward to the future and I am going to embrace the opportunities that lie ahead.
Yes, it sux. But it does help with the ambivalence, doesn't it?
I don't know about you, but I have a much clearer picture of what I want in a relationship now as opposed to when my W and I got M'd.
I absolutely agree with this.
I have a really good friend going thru the same mess. This morning he asked me what I thought about him getting involved with a woman that has been divorced twice.
I gave him some reasons why it wasn't a good idea and then said, "DING, DING, DING......big RED FLAG". She has been divorced twice. Then I realized this is his second divorce. I continued, "Wait, that puts you two in the same category. Hmm...I wonder why?" He laughed, but saw the point.
I guess I am sharing this because either we use this opportunity to learn and grow or we don't.
Originally Posted By: jbnati
I'll be praying about your jobs. Like I've said before, it will be interesting to see if/how the dynamics of your sitch shift when you move to NM.
Thanks JB. It will be interesting, however I am not sure I'd be up to waiting for her to put in the work.
Therefore, I will make the best of being a single father.
Originally Posted By: jbnati
Yes, it sux. But it does help with the ambivalence, doesn't it?
Yes it does. I feel like I am in a really good place in my life right now.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
Good to see you around Country. It is funny you made an appearance. I was thinking about you, 2step and a few others yesterday. I hope you are doing well man.
I smell what you are shoveling. I will hook it up after my trip to NM. I will be LITB No Mas.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
I'll come up with something good. The sky is the limit.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
I am seeing the light at the end of my tunnel. It doesn't appear that my M will be DB'd, but I'm excited to move forward.
I'm getting ready to jump on a plane to go see my children in NM. I can't wait.
We just got news that the company I work for was awarded a contract on the new 49ers stadium and I received a call less than 5 minutes later to set up a fourth interview for my trip.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
Hey LITB, figured I would post this on your thread since we've had this convo...
The whole Love as feeling vs. action / choice thing...
I've been trying to put my finger on it. Things like how a baby feels loved or a parent loves a child... if we were to look at the chemical aspect of bonding, is love really a choice? Or is it actually some fundamental feeling and need for the human condition?
Love "just happens"... is it really a choice...?
I've been reading 5LL and find it quite interesting. And the author writes something that I found quite profound.
People talk often about love from a perspective of TO someone. Without a doubt, in that context, love is a choice, and then an action...
But how often do we really thing of love from a FROM perspective? It doesn't quite read right, but it just splits it as TO (away from us) and FROM (towards us).
As the Chapman states, psychologists generally state love as a basic, human NEED. This led me to consider... why do we NEED to be loved? Is it simply the act of being loved (using 5LL as an example) what is necessary? Or is it actually because with those actions, we truly FEEL love or loved?
I remain resolved that love is a feeling and I agree with psychologists that it is a basic human need. It is that we can only share love through actions... we cannot directly transfer the FEEL of love to another in any other way than by actions...
You're exactly right, we will be MUCH better equipped to not find ourselves in this situation again. I don't know about you, but I have a much clearer picture of what I want in a relationship now as opposed to when my W and I got M'd. Like both you and KD, if I find what I think is that relationship, I am willing to put it on the line again.
But it does help with the ambivalence, doesn't it?
