Our story

[purgatory]

I was told that once the WAS feels that you've actually 'given in' to the sitch, and they feel like you are taking things seriously.... they start to open up. That seems like what your W has done. It's amazing to me (still!) that our instincts are wrong- it's when we do what seems to be counter-productive, that we actually notice a change.

My H also avoids a few family members- the ones who say anything that challenges his decision...sounds like your W is doing the same thing. The WAS doesn't want to hear anyone second guess them or say things that *might* make them think twice- so they avoid it completely... like a little kid who says: "I don't want to be your friend because you don't want to play what *I* want to play." In many ways, the WAS is functioning as their inner child: I want what I want when I want it- and you can't do anything about it!

Keep up the good work- it's seems to be causing a change in her!