IB - sometimes our xhs wake up and smell the coffee for a brief period. Sometimes it is the prelude to a longer wake up. Who knows?

It sort of reminds us that the man we married is in there, buried alive. Not sure whether it makes it better or worse though.

I also read a desire to feel good about himself . . .

As to your bil. What can anyone say? I would hope that your son is old enough to be able to deal with this, with your emotional support.

Clearly a pretty dysfunctional family on your h's side so no surprises there