It's Over Now

[fireman]

I've never posted on here. I'm a new member. I cheated on my wife and she found out. She almost immediately had an old attorney friend file for divorce. For the last month she has been leading me to believe that we were going to work on things (she told me later that she filed but said we would try to work things out). Two days ago, when I got home from work, I was served with divorce papers. I have been scrambling ever since to get an attorney and get things straight. I have to go to court tomorrow for the temporary custody hearing for our 2 year old son and to sort out child support. There were reasons for what I did, although no reason is ever good enough to cheat. She said that even though we were starting this, we could go to counseling. I had it in my mind that things had a chance, even though small, of working out. She told me tonight that he has no intentions of making it work though. Here is why I am posting this: I made enough money last year to warrant maximum child support in the state of Texas ($1,500 per month). My wife told me that she has no intentions of cleaning me out. I am 36 and she is 27. I have an ex wife, and when my ex and I split up I took care of her for a long time. My wife was there to see that because we had just started dating at the time and so she told her lawyer that she will decide how much I am to pay, because she knows that I am going to take care of things. I asked her how much she thinks she needs and she said $500 per month. My wife only makes about 23 grand a year. I told her that was nowhere near enough. My point is this, I guess: Even though I destroyed her, broke up our family and ruined the best thing that ever happened to me, she still is looking out for my interests as much as her own and my son's. Even though she will never be my wife again, she will always be the best person I've ever known. I hate that I did this to her. I hate that I did this to my son and to me. I'll never forgive me for it. But at the very least I know that my son will have parents that can be ok with each other even though we are divorced. What a hard life I have created.