waiting for the tides to change

[BFloat]

I think today may be the first time in a looooong time where I have woken up without that impending sense of doom. Could be my Antidepressants kicking in.. Could be because my mom was here.. Or could be because I slept in D2's bed with her again.. Whatever it is.. I'll take I for now.

My kids share a room. My S5 sleeps on the top bunk. He didn't realize I was in bed w/ D. Early in the morning, I heard him shifting around and than whispering.. Dad... Dad.. That was a tug at my heart .

H sent an email last night thanking me for responding to his email. He said he had been very worried about our financial status and hoping that by figuring some things out it will ease the stress. Also said he wants good things for the kids and concerned about their well being. I have not yet replied to that email. Finances is just one factor for the kids well being. What about being
a fulltime dad to meet their emotional well being? But that's neither here nor there.

Time to get S off to school. It's pouring rain. And I'm still standing. That's gotta count for something.