Thanks Brian, I appreciate that. Blunt is no problem, honesty is great. It's my own fault as I think sometimes I can be unclear on here.
Plus I didn't give very much at all on our 'pre-crappy-part' of our relationship, which may have made some difference. I didn't even touch on my issues early on that could have been a 'spring board' for things that happened later.
I read back my own thread and noticed how sparse my detailing is (despite how much I talk/write!! lol)
But really, this is all kind of ... on hold/irrelevant now.
I've accepted that it's over and yes, obviously my heart is still tied to the relationship that was the way it was before deployment, I know it's not realistic to think that things are going to go 'back in time' to the way they once were.
I've completely let go of what I can't control and I've even been playing around with letting go of what I CAN control. I want to let fate take it's course I guess.
In the meantime, I still find reading other people's sitches so theraputic and begun to care a lot about the well-being of a few posters on here.
I hope one day I can come back here with some good news one way or another for my own situation.
But I hope it's okay that I still come on here and write about my ups and downs.
You can think of me as a social experiment. DBing before the marriage... and DBing pretty crappily at that! lol
