I see you closing down from anger and that scares me for you a bit...
One of my most favorite people and a poster here on these boards has a saying...
The only way to do it is through it...
You have to feel your feelings about things, process those feelings, and work through them to the other side...
Please don't think that shutting down is going to help.
cat04-
you make a valid point here. I do get thoughts of shutting down due to the anger and hurt I'm going through right now. I'm not denying that I didn't have anything to do that lead H to feel that he didn't get the attention and love that he was looking for. I own my things, but I know that I'm not solely responsible and certainly do not agree with H's choice to have an EA. In the end, it is a choice that he made, and it is that choice that hurts so much that I do want to shut down. The anger and hurt do not cause me to overlook what led up to this, I'm still working on improving those things for myself.
I haven't been to IC since I learned more about OW. My next appt is on Wednesday. I hope to learn new ways to cope with the hurt and how to deal with A's. It's still too fresh and hurtful at the moment. Maybe with time it will get better.
