Most of that is lawyer talk. And while they KNOW the law, they are NOT the law....
They will try to push the limits for their client. Much the same way your lawyer will try to push that line back across the field.
Most of the time, once the assets are divided, and custody is settled, the rest goes off of a formula that the state determines.
Don't let that scare you too much.
I do believe that NY state passed a law in Jan 11 , that the person that files, HAS to pay the legal fees for both sides.
You may want to check that one out.
Most of this will go in negotiations between the lawyers. What you can live with, what you can't live with. What will you bend on , what you won't bend on.
Knowing what that list is, will be important.
What are the things you are unwilling to bend on ???
Custody ??
You BETTER have a plan of action before you negotiate.
I would approach this as giving her one weekend a month. That way you can have time for you too. That way she can have them during weekend time. And ask for that time back during the one week that you don't have them on the weekend. Realistically, then you could have them for your weekend, plus Mon, Tues, Wed, and Thu. Leaving you with an extended time while having the following weekend free for your life.
You are looking for around 15 days a month custody. That leaves a 50/50 custody. Once the days are settled, the rest is a formula that the court determines.
There are two kinds of custody that you want to look for. Physical and Legal. Legal is most likely a given, although you want to ask. Physical is the visitation.
The first thing I told my Lawyer was that if she couldn't obtain 50% custody for me, than I would find services elsewhere. My expectation was clear from the beginning.
The China pattern?
Well, I would assume you would bend on that one....
Take some time, and make a list of things you want, would like to have if possible, and things you are willing to give.
