well havent posted in awhile and things havent changed a whole lot, some ups and downs. ive had 2 coach sessions and my current plan is to "let the dust settle" , be like the friendly neighbor, avoid confrontation, be a great dad, and be attractive/confident around W.
Ive read the love languages book and learned alot about what i was neglecting in my M. my W is clearly a quality time person and after 15 years i was complacent and so caught up in my own hobbies that i was not giving her the time she deserved/needed.
The W seems to be initiating contact more frequentley lately and Ive been doing , i think, a good job of keeping the conversation friendly with compliments and praise for her accomplishments at work and etc. sometimes she seems aggravated and itching to be angry at me and ive been fairly successful at biting my tongue and keeping the conv cool.
She is still seeing the OM just as much as ever and it continues to eat at my soul, but i dont bring it up to her. Its tuff my friends heck her old friends (she hardly has any right now)tell me Im a good guy with alot goin for me. they all think she is gonna come back eventually but i shouldnt take her after what shes done and continues to do. they all beleive shes trying to keep me as a backup if the new R doesnt wrk out.cake eating i guess. but im not at the quitting point yet. i know ill get there eventually but im not there yet. my coach said she is in a MLC and she wants to punish me. but she appears to still have strong feelings for me.
Im not and have not dated anyone thru all of this but she always seems to be fishing for info and making jealous comments like i have someone in my life. she told me the other day that she keeps having dreams that i have remarried. i told her you dont have to worry about that anytime soon.She has also brought up, twice in the last week, her finishing and filing the D paperwork so that i can be free of her . i said do what you feel like you need to do. we wont be free of each other for along time we have 2 kids. is she really gonna do it or is she trying to see what my reaction would be?
The one giant positive in all of this is the relationship i have with my kids has never been better. I am a lucky man to have those 2 in my life. the W and I definitly got something right with them.
