Grace, Love, Compassion, & Faith - It ain't easy!

[Valeska19]

Well talked to wife last night.

I was reinstated because of the questions I asked Cobra. Caused some red flags.  W found out that because we hadn't legally separated, she couldn't take me off.

Here is our conversation as best as I can remember.

W:  do u know why u have been reinstated?
M:  no cobra couldn't tell me why.
W:  tells me what I wrote above.
M: oh ok.
W:  so we need to take care of the dissolution papers.  Do u know what that entails?
M:  yes.. I looked into it
W:  well I don't know what your schedule is like.. But I'd like to take care of it in the next week or two.
M:  send me the papers, I'll let you know when I'm ready,
W: (pause) ok.  It's easy.  I didn't look at it all because I didn't want to deal with it but it's only one paper.  We meet the criteria.
M: k.
W:how r u?
M: fine. U?
W: Busy.  How was your holidays?
M: good urs?
W:  weird.. But good
M:  good.
Pause.. 
W:I'm sorry.. I'm all weird.. ( followed by alot of stammering).
M:  well.. Just speak ur mind.
W:.. I just didn't know how this conversation would go.  I've been living in fear all week because I didn't hear from you.  I assumed you lawyered up.  My head ran away from me.
M:  that makes sense.  Fear can do that. I  have no intention of getting lawyers involved.  

Somehow she brought it back to her calling me.

M: I didn't realize your call was about health insurance.
W:  well next time I'll leave a detailed message so u don't ignore me. (can't remember exactly she said it).
M:   I wasn't ignoring you.  It didn't sound like an emergency.. So I thought I would get back to you when I Could.
W:  ok.  Well next time I'll leave a better message so u don't think that's it's for social reasons or whatever.
M: k.

W:  can I ask why u did it?
M:  did what?  Talk to cobra?
W:  yes.
M:  because the separation document extends insurance from 18 to 36 months.  I can't get independent health coverage due to my heart condition so I needed to find out all the info so I could best take care of myself.
W:  well I'd prefer not to pay for jan.
M:  no problem.  I'll send you a check.
W:  well it's going retroactive so I'll have to pay for December.

Ackward pause..

M: alright well (trying to end the convo)
W: (interrupts) ill send you the amount and email you the dissolution document.
M:  sounds good.  Thanks for calling. Bye

And that was it.  I have alot of feelings going on for sure.  Still trying to process them all.

Thanks for the posts JS.