Together since we were 15...Part 2

[purgatory]

Yeah, him living here daily has been really tough for both of us (I can't even believe I have sympathy for him!) but, it's hard for me to see him, want to be with him and not be allowed to- the flip side of that is that he wants out, he made his choice- and yet, he wasn't ever able to leave. It was like watching a caged lion, and his anger and resenent (that was feeding his need for the breakup) was still there everyday because he couldn't get away from me.

So even though him moving out is another Hirt that I will have to process, its a good thing for both of us. The side effect I don't like, is knowing that he's spending time with *her*.... I'm really trying not to think about it.

I think it's good that you will look back fondly of the times you've ML during the separation. I'm envious in a way, because the last time we ML was after a fight- so it was fueled by angry passion (don't get me wrong, it was good) but I wish that 'our last time' was one motivated by expressing our love for each other.

You are doing awesome things in such a short period of time!! You WILL make it through this having become a better version of you- you should be very proud of yourself!