Hi Psalm. It takes a lot of time before you really "feel" better about things. It starts with acting as if. That helps to train yourself to feel better about things. Kind of like training to prepare for the real thing....
What we tend to do here is to help people break up the tasks of repairing themselves into smaller and more manageable/attainable pieces. Several of us come back to help just as we've been helped, so you can bet we know where you are in this journey - we've been there.
It gets better. The surprise and shock wear off. The perspective is regained. Happiness is had again and you'll figure out what you like and do not like. What you're comfortable with and not comfortable with. But it takes time and effort - keep at it, P. Keep at it even when you don't feel it. The low feelings are the temporary part; good things are waiting for you if you can let go of the current "junk" and have an open hand waiting for it.
Be at peace P. While it hurts, it is temporary. While it seems dark, you may find it's the best thing to ever happen in your life.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
