1. Work on letting go of what YOUR part in this was, learning from it and changing.
2. At some point you must let go of the sadness...and create a new, fulfilling life for yourself.
3. Get with the program and move forward. You've been in neutral or reverse for too long. You can do this.
1. I am working on it. My brother and her have been doing some communication regarding the kids, in particular my son (because he's so volatile), and she's mentioned her resentment toward me in every communication they've had so far. Still! I'm doing all I can to let go of my part in this. I still need help and don't know what else to do but continue on...and continue to pray for help. I have learned from it, tons actually, and continue to do so. I've changed a lot, for the better. Everyone sees it, but there are some who use my past against me and hold it over my head whenever it's beneficial to them to do so.
2. I've let go of a lot of it. I know I still have work to do. I'm determined to do it. But it seems like those curve balls and punches to the stomach continue to come. And my past is used against me at every opportunity. It makes it hard to let go of it under those circumstances...it's like (the opinion is) I should have to pay for my sins for the rest of my life, and I deserve no happiness because of my actions in the past. I'm constantly reminded of it. I talked to the realtors last night and am going to get my house ready to sell. I'm stoked about it. Now's a good time for me to take a step up snd get a nicer home. I no longer want to be in this house (it's the one that WE lived in....she even picked it out). I think this change will be good for me.
3. I have been in neutral, or sometimes reverse, for a long damn time. It seems there are those who want to keep me there, and I must be resolute and stronger mentally to overcome that. I want to be able to completely let go of everything I have no control over, such as opinions and resentments and actions of others, and exercise the 'only' control that I do have...my reactions. I have COMPLETE control over those...and I want to react/respond well. I CAN do this...God willing. Just gotta respond well to the 'bad' that is still there.
"Always go straight forward, and if you meet the devil, cut him in two and go between the pieces." - William Sturgis, clipper ship captain, 1830's.
