Confused and alone

[purgatory]

I think the LBS all want some version of 'revenge' or 'justice' to our WAS.... but you can't fight anger, resentment, rejection and hurt with more of them. Our only weapons are strength, humbleness, compassion, understanding and love. Bklyn is right, we (the LBS) have to do 99% of the work, but I think that we will be ther better person because of it.

At church last night, I heard a great quote. It's from a football coach, but it was applied to marriage:
"My job is to get them to do the things they don't *want* to do in order to make them the men they *want* to be." (Cowboys old coach, sorry don't remember his name. Said in regards to their superbowl win.)

I applied it to DBing like this: The LBS has to do the stuff we don't *want* to do (180's, keeping our mouth shut, acknowledging/accepting... basically all the HARD stuff) in order to get to where we *want* to be: reconciliation.

**Trust me, I am NO WHERE close to being comfortable with the hard work, but I know that's where I need to be.