I guess I didn't update much about our trip last weekend. As I had hoped it started off very well. We were back in our element, in a place that holds a lot of good emotions for us. The first two days we had a lot of fun, almost like old times but obviously not quite. By mid day on Sat I could sense the pulling away, so i did the same as best i could. We already arranged dinner with friends but other than that i kept my distance as best i could given we're at the same event together and sharing an expensive hotel room. I had planned to leave with a friend for all of sunday, but she took off and walked the city on her own in the morning, killing a couple of hours and essentially sabotaging the day, as there was some work that needed to be done before i could go. That night, dinner and staying with friends before flying out on monday. That the real pull away saying she wished i'd move out when we got home. I essentially ignored that. I let her vent and a bunch of old stuff from the holidays, stuff we'd already talked about came up again. Nothing much I could say but the same apologies as before again. On the way to the airport, I kind of went off with standing up for myself to the inaccurate accusations on things she thinks i'm doing but i'm not. I'm trying to be as honest as possible, but i guess she'll believe what she wants to believe.
So fast forward to today, i've been trying to be dark, grey I guess since we're both focusing on the kids. But there's been no "good night's" or "good mornings". I'm responding when she talks, in kind but not initiating as best i can.
Yesterday as I went downstairs she was laying on the couch crying, i pretended not to notice, left my cup in the sink and went back to my office.
I've been to the doctor twice this week, physical and tests, and she's been quite nosy about that. I'm cleaning the snow off the car and she's asking me where i'm going. I don't ask her, bizarre she doesn't see the coincidence.
I think i'm doing the right things we'll see how the rest of the week goes.
