So I drifted in and out of sleep in a mild state of disbelief all night. It seems like it is possible that I am transitioning *maybe* out of one phase of this and into another. The "talking" phase. I need help, because what I am beginning to see is that she is expressing doubts in my sincerity and I don't really know the best way to handle or reassure. I received the following messages from her this morning on the drive in to work:
"I would like to know why it took my leaving for you to 'get it' "
"I am also suspicious of the timing of your letter. Why now?"
I periodically glance at the "piecing" board and pretty much believe there is trust that needs to be gained back somehow (consistency in words AND actions??) - I think it is just now hitting me that IF I am entering this stage (big IF) this is not going to be easy.
I am prepared to answer both of her questions. The "why did it take me leaving" issue has come up and I DO owe her a response on that - I think I will write that one as well (much, much, much shorter letter). As for the "why now" question....what do you say, you know?
