OH and incidentally...I think that the whole divorce/MLC thing in terms of money going in to retirement can affect that dynamic for a few years...but it can't affect it FOREVER. Newbees need to understand that. There is a point when the divorce settlement reaches equilibrium and no more can be "lost" monetarily

For me it was one year, 7 months, though I think for some it drags on longer (we didnt' have kids).

M45
Bomb 6/09; EA 6/10; Divorced 1/11
Proud single mom of 7 little feline girls and one little feline boy
"Fall down 53 times. Get up 54." -- Zen saying