Hi - My name is Molly and I have been married for a little over 10 years. Before Christmas my husband told me that he wanted a divorce. He said he would stay until the girls finished school and then would be moving out.
Even though we have had some REALLY rocky times, I never thought he would actually do this. He is rock solid that there is nothing that can be done and that nothing will change his mind. This is so painful to me and I have been "going through the motions" since he told me. I can't eat or sleep.
We have two beautiful children ages 3 and 9. I love this man, even though I will be the first to admit that I have been neglectful, distant and down right mean to him. I cannot lose this marriage, I don't want to lose our family and I don't want a divorce for my children.
I have read Divorce Busters and Divorce Remedy and I really need some further direction/support. At this time I cannot afford telephone coaching and feel so sad about that.
We still live in the same home, although don't sleep in the same room and he has quit wearing his wedding ring. He still wants to have sex and we have. I'm not sure if this should be happening, but it is. Any feedback on that would be helpful.
I know I have hit "rock bottom" and realize my mistakes. It just cannot be too late. As I said before, we have had a multitude of problems. I have promised to make changes before, and did for awhile, then reverted back. He says that I am being "fake nice" right now. He says that too much has happened and there is too much resentment. He says that he cares about me, but isn't in love with me anymore and never will again.
I have made many mistakes over being insecure and jealous. I have accussed him of things and behaved badly based solely on what was in my head. He has never given me any reason to doubt him. Still, in my head I viewed any other female, friend, hobby, etc. as a threat.
Help me please with any thoughts, advice, suggestions, etc. I feel so desperate and alone!!! I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life making myself, him and our family happy. I'm not sure what else to post. I am new to this and feeling self-concious and nervous. If anyone wants more info, just ask.
I really don't think there is anyone else (OW), and he has said that there is not. He has reconnected with several family members through facebook that I have never met. One female cousin in particular, I think may be influencing him. Should I try and talk to her or do anything to address this matter? He is constantly on his cell, texting, emailing and talking to "someone???", I think her. This drives me crazy and pushes ALL my insecurity/jealous buttons.
