I would never in a million years say that to her. Sure, maybe during my pre-DB days I would have (hell, I MIGHT have) - but now I know much, much better.
The only reason I think that now is that I have spent a lot of time digging into myself and my contributions to our meltdown and trying to rectify things. Honestly (to borrow from 25) I think marriage to me would be different and better from this point forward. SO, I say that she doesn't HAVE to lose time with our son because the life that she left is not the life she would be coming back to.
I know that I have unknowingly caused a lot of harm and emotional damange to her....QUITE by accident - and I know it will take time to heal and for her to trust me again.
Wanting it now, and wanting her to believe instantly that life will be better is a total fantasy - I know that. It took me awhile to get there, it will take me awhile to get out.
