Indecision and the affair continues (Part 2)

[Nblost]

Thanks GH, I agree and am still feeling detached.

I think for me, I've been processing since July and kept getting knocked back by waves of increasing craziness by H. I think the holidays were my line in the sand and I just really couldn't keep living how I was living.

Meeting this new guy was like a gift. I'm not in the mood for a new relationship, but I think the little boost I needed was to have someone interested in me as a person who is genuinely nice. The contrast to my H just showed me why I don't want to put up with his A anymore. (I guess the good and bad news is that a cheating spouse sets the bar really low for someone new!)

I'm glad I tried DB-ing and I guess I'm still doing it on some level (I think I've gone dark)...but, I really no longer care if it works if H doesn't change.

I think everyone has their own line in the sand and maybe some people can live like this indefinitely. For me, life is too short. I also think that there's a chance that things have to change and be shaken up for the A to ever end.

I'm still hurting inside, but am getting to a more peaceful place.