Jealous of your wonderful Christmas. My family is still somewhat torn asunder by all that has passed. Next year, I vow to be better at organization and participation. Time just really got away from me this year. Then, when lightening hit my computer! Suffice it to say, I've been a bit out of it this month.
Hi SA, so happy that you had a nice Xmas...and you are right, with our exes...their new lives are probably not as wonderful as they imagined they would be...
(((hugs)))
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Wow! The reality of leaving one's family really hits hard at a time like Christmas. I'm glad you were able to get a glimpse.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Just out of curiosity I have a poll question. It seems that many of you (LBS) have either heard apologies or regrets from your MLCers for what they've done at some point in their journeys.
I thought it would be interesting to hear from everyone on whether or not you've ever heard any type of apology/regret and how long into their journey did you hear it? Thanks!
I'll start off. H left Oct 5, 2009, and I or the kids have yet to hear an apology or even one word of regret from him. I have no expectations that we ever will.
I'll start off. H left Oct 5, 2009, and I or the kids have yet to hear an apology or even one word of regret from him. I have no expectations that we ever will.
I have not either and I disagree with the bold above and would like to point out that it IS an EXPECTATION albeit it is in the negative.
Most MLC'ers do come through the tunnel, just not on anyone elses schedule but their own.
SA I had what I thought was a heartfelt apology and desire to reconcile at the beginning of 2011 - this was more than 5 years post bomb. However this period of remorse and regret and attempted reconciliation lasted about 2/3 weeks, and it was like watching snow melting in the sun, he gradually withdrew back into MLC, and I would say has been 'worse' since then . . . . Was it anything I did. No I truly do not think so. I was supportive, non pressurising, and let him talk as much as he wanted to.
I believe I had worked through my own anger and demonstrated forgiveness . . . . So apology is no indicator that they are coming out of MLC. I believe they 'wake up' periodically, and Dr Jekyll attempts to claw his way out, but MLC and their unresolved issues so often pull them back into what has become an easier way of life. Dealing with the aftermath of betrayal is hard for the MLCer.
