Thanks for reminding us that there can be a light at the end of the DB tunnel.
I hope things continue to go up for you
One thing the DB book said was to keep make sure to see small positive changes, instead of looking too far ahead for the big game changes.
That's what I have been doing, and seeing changes for the better every day.
For example I picked up on this yesterday. When my W leaves a VM or is going out she says she loves me when she leaves. That is an amazing change from the bomb days. That never would have happened before.
Another thing is that we are still in different rooms but I do note that she never refers to it as her room. She just refers to it as her gallery, photo room, etc. Its a small thing but it does mean that something better than her referring to it as her room.
You are a true inspiration to all of us in the midst of this mess.
Your patience is and will be rewarded.
You are in my prayers.
M 38 W 50 S 9, D 6 T 12 M 10 W's 1st EA 4/2007 stopped after confront W's 2nd EA 6/2010 Separated 7/2010 I bomb dropped 7/2010 MC 2/2011 - 3/2011 W bomb dropped 4/2011 Nothing filed or done
Bklyn and Mac...patience is important but I think more important is two fronts. One is truly knowing your WAS has to do this in order to redefine themselves and find true answers and the other is knowing you have your own life that also needs work.
If you can truly love your spouse and let them find their way, and realize that you are in charge of your own happiness then its not so much patience in an intolerable sitch but a sweet surrender to love and the universe.
My wife has told me she loves me more times this past weekend then all of the past year combined. I'm certainly not immune to wanting the perfect marriage in my hands right now when she says this to me....but I chose to love her and respect her and let her take as long as she needs. I don't know if we will fully reconcile. We probably will but if not I have found a peace like never before. I could not have done this without people like you.
