Thank you for your replys. Ot was right that I wasn't being genuine with what I was saying and I was basically using it as tactic.
It's such a funny time for me as I am away again and spent Christmas away from my family and I was having thoughts of 'what am I doing with my life'. I guess the being 30 thing kicks in occasionally and not being even near to settling down and having babies kicks in. But then I am taking life's opportunities and having a great time and meeting new people and living in new places and having a great time.
I don't know how long I'll be away this time. I am seeing what happens in life, but it is hard to let go of the control sometimes.
I didn't talk to Joe. It wasn't the right time, but I will and I think when I do I'll have a better idea of what I really want to say, when I understand my own feelings a bit more.
