Hey LITB, I did want to chime in as well and say how well you otherwise seem to be doing.
A few months ago my W was angry with me and accusing me of going after spousal. Of course at the time I would have considered it but I hadn't. I thought of all the different people she might have got that mis-information from.
In the end, I found out that her L and the L I had been seeking advice from (but had not retained for cost reasons) had spoken. Apparently, the L I spoke with stated that to my W's L.
I was upset, but I really chalked it up to L posturing. I have no doubt my L was simply stating a possibility and meant no harm and had my best interest in mind. Still, it really did not help the rift that was already in place.
Just like our spouses, we can assert our desires to our Ls, but they are human and apt to do what they will do and we can't really control that. Just communicate better with them and roll with the punches that our sitches throw at us.
