NP, Abbey. I really do so get that feeling. I really did have many, many opportunities to "catch" my W. It was the hardest thing to not do, after the snooping part...
It took me a long, long time to get over it and eventually, I did. Even now, I still have moments of anxiety over it.
Part of what helped me was truly knowing that there was nothing I could do to stop her. Nothing... Well, not just knowing that, but accepting that... completely...
The opportunity for an A arises and the reasons are really irrelevant. They move towards it and that is that. The reasons... our contribution, their contribution, the OP's contribution... is all really irrelevant. There are no take backs... only acceptance, forgiveness, surrender... transformation... you're transformation to the person you become... the FANTASTIC person you grow into, because of working through the hurt and re-learning to trust and love again... trust and love one's self...
