La Bug-Clouds in my Coffee

[ces67]

Good morning labug! Catching up on some reading this morning and was going through your sitch. Thanks for all your insights and thoughts. Its been helpful. Its funny how I see either me or my W in the situations you mentions.

Comments that compare to my W:
I had another realization yesterday...I've always carried a lot of anger which led to resentments. I played the rescuer, the fixer, and yes, sometimes the martyr, always seeking the approval and praise of others. When they didn't respond the way I wanted, the resentment came and I cared for, fed and nurtured it. I blamed others for my anger, "Couldn't they see how I had sacrificed for them? How I had fixed things for them?" Needless to say, they didn't ask for my sacrificing or fixing.


Comments that compare to me:
I have always had difficulty with fun activities or other things that are "just for me." I was raised in an atmosphere of scarcity, so felt guilty spending money on me. (guilt and shame, huge motivators-?demotivators for me)

These just scratch the surface but wanted to give some examples.

Also, you said.."I guess this is all to say that I've changed and I'm happy with myself and my life. I'm OK and I will continue to be OK as long as I stay on this track."

Ditto on this. waiting for the "ok" feeling to be more consistent and not falling back on the misery around W's behaviors but all in time.

Take care and hope you have a great weekend.