West, I too have a problem with OCD and perfectionism. My IC has really helped my overcome this, as I am not as bad now.

It is strange how OCD and perfectionism made me such a great Marine, but hurt my marriage.

The other day when my W and I had a long talk we discussed my perfectionist attitude. We talked about loading the dishwasher or refilling the ice trays. We laughed and when told her there is no right way, I can't believe I got upset about those things.

Something I realized was:

*Everybody has their own view of perfection, there is no true perfection, don’t expect perfection.

*Do set agreements on standards with each other

*Share housework (do it together) so you both know each other’s standards

*ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST

I am not saying I am cured from my OCD, but I am on the right track. That is why I keep recommending the book "The Four Agreements" to everyone, it truly changed my life.

M 33
W 29
S 4
M 5
T 7
11/7/11 Separation, W moves in with parents
12/1/11 W: "IDLY, I'm not coming back, it's over"
1/7/12 D Bomb Dropped