Enough with the lies - what is going on???

[greatwhitenorth]

Something I missed but I think is important...H and I had no real fights or arguments either. I know now that it was because he wasn't emotionally engaged in our relationship, he wasn't connected or committed on the same level as me. He didn't invest. This is partly why he could leave so easily.

Does your husband tend to compartmentalize things? Are your friends separate or blended? How about your families? Compartmentalization is a coping mechanism for people who struggle with emotional engagement and intimacy.

When H left he abandoned not only me but his fishing buddy, who is the husband of my close friend and his cycling buddy, who is also my sister's husband. We spent virtually all our social time with these people and he hasn't talked to them since. Instead, he returned to his work friends, all of whom are married and/or have kids. H has 20 year old daughter and never wanted kids, let alone to be surrounded by someone else's. He's gonna blow eventually.