So tomorrow we're leaving for Retrouvaille. I'm on pins and needles just worried about the car ride after we drop off our son. I printed out a few chapters that I would like my husband to read in The Divorce Remedy, but I'm not sure if I should or not. I also have other articles that I would like him to read as well. Yesterday I called his mom again, just for a little more reassurance about if he's really going in with an open mind, and she told me his grandmother just heard she had to go in for heart surgery tommorrow. They're not sure what exactly needs worked on though as of yet, and she told me they wouldn't know until they had her under the knife, which didn't make sense to me, but whatever. Then I talked to my husband about it, and he told me we'd be on call all weekend in case something happened with his grandmother, which I totally understand since I love his grandmother a lot. But while talking to him, I heard a baby laughing in the back ground, and another womans voice, and I didn't say anything but, "sounds like you have the tv going pretty loud" and he just responded with a, "yeah" So, of course my fears kick in that the OW, who just finalized her own divorce was there, in the marital home, with her 2 year old child. I'm just so afraid that he'll choose to start a new life with the newly divorced, and leave our family in shambles. He's always been the type to want nothing other than to start with a clean slate. His answer to all of our conflicts was to just forget that it ever happened and start over. Like hitting the reset button on a video game or something. I also spoke with one of the Retrouvaille people again last night for additional encouragement. It is slightly comforting knowing I'm not the only one calling in tears, and uncertainty, and of course fear of impending doom. I just know my worst fear is the drive back home, if he decides that he truly doesn't want to try and help rebuild our family. I'm wondering if I can just have him take a taxi to the nearest bus station for him to get home on his own if that were the case. Hopefully we'll come back in the same car, and that I'll come back with good news on Monday.
