Went to meet with the D lawyer today... that was rough. I feel like I'm accepting my fate and admitting defeat. But I know it's the responsible thing to do.
I've been finding myself looking at quotes and inspirational sayings for comfort during this whole debacle.... this one is pretty well known, but I have a new perspective on it: "Character is Tested When You're Up Against It"
I think it rings true for the WAS and the LBS. For the WAS- the M got tough, too tough as most of them say, and they walked away. It makes me think of the vow: "for better or worse" and how when it came down to the wire, the WAS couldn't keep that vow: that adversity was too much for their character to stand up against.
For the LBS: our current sitch's are testing our character. We have to make the choice everyday, every hour to continue to stand for our M or 'give in' and move on. I know that I personally, have wavered on this several times in the past month... I can only imagine how much others have wavered in their longer sitchs.
This is my new favorite quote, and I think it applies to DB principle's very well. "The highest reward for man’s toil is not what he gets for it but what he becomes by it."— John Ruskin (I originally posted this on 2TP post, because he has chosen to become a man that loves his W unconditionally and will continue to stand for his M, a glimpse into his character.)
==================== In other news.... Today is S5's b-day. I can't believe he is already 6... where did the time go?? We are planning a family dinner ('breakfast' for dinner, S choice) and having a few friends over for ice cream/presents afterwards. I have no doubt that H will smile, laugh and be happy tonight- for our son. I wish we could reminisce about the years gone by with S and give each other a hug and a kiss to celebrate. H used to give me flowers on S's birthday, because he said: "there would be no [son] if it wasn't for you".... don't think I'm getting those this year.
M-31, H-31 T-9, M-7 S-6, s-20mth sep 8/1/11 ILYNILWY 11/29/11 Creating separation papers. Discover H has feelings for BFF, she does too 1/11/12 H moves out 1.20.12