SHE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH ANOTHER MAN. One that is ongoing. And no, she doesn't get to keep you as her best friend AND sleep with the OM.
That discomfort is actually making her deal with what she's done in a way that she never would have done if you'd just indulged her "best friends forever" fantasy.
And the fact that she can't understand or respect the fact that you have this (entirely reasonable) boundary - says something about her selfishness.
I mean, a healthy person would understand, "wow, I really hurt my spouse by cheating on them, maybe it's too much to expect them to be my buddy right now".
Instead, she keeps getting mad at you.
Although - I will say, there's an old trick that often is enlightening. Take a statement of hers, replace all the "you"s with "I"s - and you often can hear what they are REALLY thinking.
For instance, she said:
Quote:
I just really feel like you're going to look back at this and wish that you'd handled things differently. I feel sorry for you.
But she MEANT:
Quote:
You just really feel like I'm going to look back at this and wish that I'd handled things differently. You feel sorry for me.
