Lots of time to think today. Complete waffling from "this is over, get the D done and move on", to "keep the way home paved smooth, and leave the door open a crack"
I guess one side of this internal argument needs to win at some point. I am finding it hard to believe that the rejection and wrongful treatment I am feeling is going to dissipate anytime soon. As the legal battles loom, I simply cannot believe that I may need to do battle with this woman I have been in love with, and still am, for years. How wrong can this be?
Am also struggling with the fact I have been replaced by the OM on the rebound, and that my STBX simply wants nothing to do with me. How long has she been lying to me over the past few years? Have I just been played, all while I have been taking the high road and supporting her every step of the way?
The internal turmoil just does not seem to stop. Wonder if it ever does.
H 51, W 46 no kids T 22 years M 17 years ILBNILWY 2/10 1st D talk 6/10 partial recovery W files D 5/11 long distance separation 8/11 moving forward on D 10/11 legal separation complete 1/2012
