Good luck at the MC. Our MC suggested we read a book actually called "Boundaries" It not really a marriage book but it does help understand boundary issues.
I don't think it's ever occurred to him that he would need to *ask* permission to come over... because he hasn't fully realized that his choice means: this is not *his* house anymore. It's sad, really. My H wants everything to stay the same- but at the same time, wants to get away from *me* and have his own space.... how's that cake taste?!?
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I think my W is doing something very similar. She wants to do nothing to work on the M but expects me to continue to provide support and be helpful. She continues to live in the house and take no responsibility for any expenses and does not give active pursuit to getting a job. In the meantime I continue to pay down all the debt that she's contributed to significantly.
I guess that's what you all mean by "cake-eater".
Good luck!
Me:45, W:45 S:16 D:13 M:22, T:25 Bomb: July 2010 Putting finances in order for "D" Continue to live in same home-separate rooms