To clarify a couple of things. - We are Canadian and in the CF, common-law has the same rights as a married couple. Everything is exactly the same. With concrete proof (eye witness, photos, video) he would be charged and sent home early from his tour. His career would be badly damaged. - I do not have any of this kind of proof. NOR would I do this to him DESPITE what a jerk he is being - The bills and housing stress - we have had A PLENTY! lol!! And I am taking care of it all. But one great thing is I am good with money and I have got him out of the hole in every bill and debt he has. Something nice to come home to I am sure.
I will take your opinion at face value that he only proposed to me to keep me to take care of his house, but I don't think that's entirely true. He wouldn't have signed his entire life over to me if this had been the case. I have EVERYTHING. His house, life insurance, POA, the works.
But I def agree that because we don't have any legal ties besides whats listed above, and because this relationship is in its first two years, that it is probably a good idea to let it go. I am not the type to take advantage of my position with the POA and stuff (which lots of women have/do - I've heard horror stories of guys coming back from tour to an empty house and bank account )
I totally agree with you that I need to back off. This may sound like a small feat, but yesterday was day one! That I need to basically act as if it's over. And you know what? I DON'T want to be in the relationship the way it is now. So I guess I will lean on this to help me detach.
As much as I love him. As much as I hope we can be in each others' lives, things need to change drastically for both of us in order for it to survive.
Thank you very much again for taking the time to give me some insight. And for backing up that I have a right to 'back off'. I kind of felt... guilty.. backing off before because he is in a crappy sitch over there. But he doesn't deserve (or want) different right now.
)
